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Wednesday, August 03, 2005
Hide Away

so you say you don't need God's angels
to heal your broken spirit
you have done away with love
for when has it ever been blissful
you cry out
and you shake your fist at the skies
no one told you
giving your heart away
was going to be hell
and you hide away
underneath your sheets
and you numb your pain
with stoic aloofness
and you carry in your pocket
the pieces of your heart
for who could break them
if you don't piece it together again



-prescribed by-

@6:50 PM

-1 came for therapy session-



Monday, May 09, 2005
No Flowers

there are no flowers
for the forgotten
no applause,
no standing ovation
for the unappreciated
no slow dances
for the ones
not wearing the sparkly dress
no songs written
for the unbeautiful
no arms wide open
for the lonely
no goodnight kisses
for those who never sleep

walk on by
move along
there is nothing to see

don't ask me
what my favorite flowers are
there are no flowers
for me



-prescribed by-

@7:20 AM

-0 came for therapy session-



Wednesday, May 04, 2005
Hesitation

she picks up her pen
and wait for her thoughts to unfold
she thinks of nothing
her story goes untold

she walks to the edge of the cliff
she braces herself, prepares to fly
she takes a step back, afraid of falling
she thinks, "it's just too high."

she's on her knees and prays to God
"Lord, grant me courage and give me a reason.
help me change who i am and what i've become,
stop me from being my own prison."



-prescribed by-

@7:59 PM

-0 came for therapy session-



Tuesday, April 12, 2005
Leap of faith

i loathe
that i don't play.
the game is waiting for me
and i sit
by the sidelines
waiting for someone else
to play
and wonder
why i never win.

the Spotlight seeks me
i hide under the rafters
i am the unheralded champion
long-forgotten
and paralyzed.

Everyone is waiting for me.

I dive. And surface alive.



-prescribed by-

@4:12 PM

-0 came for therapy session-



Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Murmurs

i messed up
i tripped
i failed, i've fallen
i made a mistake
wide awake

i'm guilty
it's painful
it's terrible
i'm miserable
don't judge me

afraid
sullen
beaten
broken
darkness surrounding

can anyone hear me?
will no one see?



-prescribed by-

@9:26 AM

-0 came for therapy session-



Saturday, January 08, 2005
Beautiful Tragedy

i've melted into you a thousand times
it's hard to see where i end, you start
i know your every breath, every sigh
you are the peace in my madness.

i sense when you hesitate
you wonder how can i read your mind
i push you just enough
so i can still pull you back in.

it took storms and raging wars
to get to this paradise
you are my exquisite disaster.

the path to you has broken me
but your strength and beauty
healed this wrecked butterfly.
out of this beautiful tragedy, you.



-prescribed by-

@10:00 AM

-0 came for therapy session-



Tuesday, December 14, 2004
About Last Night

it's been some time
since i saw that face
all rage, all fury
hellbent to hurt
you never watch your words
when anger is your agenda
and your venomous tongue stings me
and i die inside
as that who was to save me
has forsaken me.

are you satisfied now?



-prescribed by-

@7:14 PM

-0 came for therapy session-



Saturday, December 04, 2004
I am here

do you ever notice me
do you ever notice my hands
once soft, now calloused and rough,
marked
by all that i have done for you
that way, you can breathe relief
that nothing more is expected of you.

do you ever feel me
do you feel the earth tremble,
as my tears of loneliness
drop to the ground,
with the weight of a pain
i have been trying to rid of
in the afternoons when it is quiet
and you are out there
conquering your world
and i am here, piecing mine together.

do you see me
standing there in all that i am
with tired shoulders and jaded eyes
just trying to keep afloat
barely breathing and so afraid
that once i stay still
i will drown in my own undoing,
darkness finally overcomes me.

i do not need you to save me.
just see.

i am here.



-prescribed by-

@8:30 AM

-0 came for therapy session-



Thursday, October 07, 2004
27

she turned twenty-seven today
and her world was falling apart
she was hanging by the edges
as she listened to the breaking of her heart

in a world that was moving too fast
it seemed time stood still for her
trapping her in a room with no doors
no windows she can break and shatter

she closed her eyes and took a breath
but the air was so heavy, her breath now gasps
she let one tear fall from her eye, only one
then she count to three, letting her weakness go past

she turned twenty-seven today
and her world has fallen apart
she was slipping into darkness
as they stepped on the pieces of her heart.



-prescribed by-

@11:00 AM

-0 came for therapy session-



Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Surrender

I will take that step
And step out of the darkness
I surrender
To a Higher Power
Let it illuminate me
From within.

I will stand
At the edge of a cliff
With my arms spread
Towards the heavens
I will let go
And be not afraid

I will not be afraid
My faith is my power
There is nothing more
To fear.



-prescribed by-

@11:49 PM

-0 came for therapy session-



Friday, November 07, 2003
Cleansing

I wash myself
Till I am new
I go out
Into the world
And be muddied
By your words

I wash myself again
Wiping hard
Till there was no hint
That I had ever been dirty

I go out again
And fall into the muddy banks
Tripping, screaming
For it seems endless

And I silently wail
As I wash myself again
Scrubbing my skin raw, bruising
I bleed, breaking myself
And I wince from the pain
The water stinging my scars

And I am never clean again
Always bleeding
Ever broken.



-prescribed by-

@4:35 PM

-0 came for therapy session-



untitled

Jarred
From the refuge
Of deep slumber
Sunlight beams
And I am blinded
For a moment
I remember to breathe
As I fall into the cycle
Of running away
For me to catch up
Always one step behind
The race has ended
But I'm still on it



-prescribed by-

@1:22 AM

-0 came for therapy session-




P1040805 i'm a twenty-something dreamer and wannabe writer. currently living in Hong Kong with the husband, the daughter and the dog.

for more illuminating tidbits about me, click here!

head to my main blog,A Dose of Xtessa!

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PATIENTS SINCE 2004

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  • Hide Away
  • No Flowers
  • Hesitation
  • Leap of faith
  • Murmurs
  • Beautiful Tragedy
  • About Last Night
  • I am here
  • 27
  • Surrender



  • November 2003
  • October 2004
  • December 2004
  • January 2005
  • April 2005
  • May 2005
  • August 2005



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